Friday, September 30, 2011


Aku pelik dengan perangai kau. Kenapalah kau ni suka sangat susahkan diri kau sendiri. Cuba bagi aku beberapa sebab yang logik kenapa kau jauhkan diri kau dari aku...
Aku tak suka cara kau yang langsung tak nak tegur aku tau. Aku sedih bukan sebab aku ade feel ngan kau. Tapi aku sedih sebab kau masih tak anggap aku member kau!!! Aku tak suka la ingat history between us tu lagi...aq da close the case tau...
Aku tau memang tak mudah punya nak lupekan dengan ape yang aku dah buat dengan kau terhadap diri kau but terus terang aku cakap tu semua salah aku bukan salah kau. Aku yang kucar-kacirkan keadaan between us and make the gap become more bigger.
Secara jujurnya aku memang pernah suka ngan kau tapi tak lame sebab lepas tu aku anggap kau da macam one family ngan aku tapi aku tau perasaan tu tetap tak sama walaupun aku anggap kau macam bro aku. Tapi the past was still past. Baik forget jup...
Aku bukan simple minded tapi aku lagi suke lepaskan black history di mane aku dulunya seorang perempuan yang agak liar. Dulu aku tak sedar lagi. Masa aku form 2,3 memang kalau kat uma tu jahil sungguh aku ne. Aku bukanlah perempuan yang baik kalau kat uma. Perangai aku at school and house it quite very different.
Tapi sejahil-jahilnya aku, aku cepat sedar kalau ada orang tegur aku lagi-lagi adik sendiri yang tegur.J
Secara fakta nyer aku suke dgn cara yang aku dah buat sekarang. Takde la rasa dosa sangat berbanding dengan ape yang aku buat dulu. Kalau kau tetap jauhkan diri jugak takpe la mungkin kau still terasa hati dengan sikap aku yang suke hentam balik perasaan orang laki. Tapi aku rasa lega atas perbuatan aku sebab aku rasa beban yang ade kat dalam hati aku dah hilang dan aku dah rasa tak berdosa atas peristiwa gelap tu sebab aku dah mohon ampun pada Allah s.w.t atas segala perbuatan aku selama 3 tahun tu.

Walaupun kau pergi meninggalkan diriku namun dirimu akan tetap berada di hatiku kerana aku tidak akan dapat melupakan bibirmu yang sentiasa mengukir senyuman yang tulus dan ikhlas pada diriku ini.
Sehingga kini,aku tetap mengingati segala detik-detik manis antara kita yang telah kita cipta bersama di dunia ini di mana ia merupakan tempat dirimu berada sementara kau masih hidup dan sihat.
Begitu payah bagiku saatku menemani dirimu di ruang yang penuh dengan alat bantuan bagi meneruskan degupan jantungmu dan nadimu. Ku tahu kau menderita namun begitu dalam situasi sebegitu sekalipun kau tetap mencuba mengukirkan sebuah senyuman yang begitu telus.
Aku tahu niat dirimu yang sebenar namun dengan melihat rupamu yang begitu menyengat kalbuku ia tetap tidak dapat menghilangkan perasaan tersebut iaitu perasaan gusar dalam diriku padamu.
Aku sentiasa mendoakan kesejahteraan hidupmu selama ini agar dirimu sentiasa sihat dan tidak menimpa sebarang masalah selagi  nyawa dikandung badan.
Namun sudah di takdirkan kau terpaksa menempuh cubaan terakhir dari Allah di dunia yang zahir ini. Di atas muka bumi ini kau di mandikan,di solatkan, di kafankan dan di perut bumi ini kau di tanamkan.
Ku doakan dari dunia ini agar dirimu berada disisi orang-orang yang beriman dan roh dan jasadmu sentiasa selamat dari segala seksaan Allah. Semoga rohmu aman di sana iaitu di akhirat.
Bukan semua orang dapat menjadi orang yang tabah dalam menghadapi segala ujian Allah seperti mana kau menjalaninya kerana orang yang tabah merupakan golongan yang sentiasa mengingati Allah yang Maha Esa.

Andai takdir telah menentukan kita bepisah,
Maka berpisahlah kita...
Namun itu tidak bermakna aku tidak boleh mengubahnya
Kerana sekiranya kita berusaha munkin nasib akan menyebelahi kita...
Melainkan kita sudah sehabis daya mengubahnya namun tiada apa yang berubah,
Bermakna kita harus tawakal...
Tanpa sebab kau pergi...
Tanpa sebarang kenyataan yang tepat kau menyalahkan diriku...
Mengapa kau berdusta dengan perasaanmu sendiri???
Jangan kau pungkiri kenyataan itu...
Kerana aku tau diriku masih lagi lekat di hati dan mindamu...
Jangan kau ketepikan kenyataan ini...
Andai satu ketika nanti kita bertemu kembali...
Adakah mungkin kau akan menolehku sepertiwaktu kita bersama dahulu???
Sememangnya indah jika waktu itu dapat di putarakan semula...
Bayangan tersebut akan tetap bermain di mataku setiap kaliku mengingati dirimu...
Bagaimana dengan dirimu pula???
Adakah kau juga berfikiran sama dengan diriku???
Masihkah engkau mengingati setiap detik yang pernah kita lalui bersama seperti mana aku mengingatinya???
Ku masih berharap agar dirimu dapat menerima diriku seadanya...
Ketika dirimu di ambang kesusahan ku sedia menghulurkan bantuan
Ini kerana ku tidak ingin dirimu ditimpa sebarang kesusahan...
Ku tahu bantuan ku tidaklah sebesar sebagaimana bantuan yang pernah kau hulurkan padaku...
Namun, ku tetap ikhlas memberikan bantuan kecil itu dan ku begitu berharap kau ikhlas menerima bantuan tersebut...
Adakah memang tiada harapan lagi di antara kita untuk mengecapi kebahgiaan bersama???
Sememangnya perit bagi diriku menjalani perasaan ini sendiri...
Namun apakan daya...
Nasib tidak menyebelahi...
Segalanya sudah tertulis di suratan takdir...
Yang kita memang tiada jodoh untuk bersama selamanya...

Friday, September 23, 2011

hari suka dan duka antara kita...

dear blog,
blog aq tw kw bkn privacy....tp aq rs adw baek nyer bler kw x jd private like fb...
cerita suka dan duka antara kita mungkin akan terluah jgk stu ari nnt...
dan hari ini adalah hari yg ckup sedih dan gembira bg aq...
aq gembira sb ya their idea is doesn't weird enough...spin bottle game and say the truth....
yg sedih nyer bler aq kene soalan yg agk cepu emas...n thats thnx tu hishamuddin b. zaidi sb dy tkg bg soalan tu...
pe lg korek la sgale secret...dig..dig..dig...until it become a big hole...tahniah ye sb jd tkg korek....
4 tahun 8 bulan 21 hari aq smpn rahsia tu dgn mama n 4 others people...akhirnye terbukak jgk dpn 10 org bdk klas SC1...nnt kter smbg cter nyer yerk...just wait...(^A^)v

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

JANGANLAH KAU TINGGALKAN DAKU
Kenapa ek aku tak bole betol la tak ingat kat dia even for an hour...
Giler ape nak soh aku ingat denagn mamat ue every minute...
Tak sanggup dok...
Aku bole mati ker kalau lupa kejap jek dengan muka dia ue...
So...
Mengikut firasat aku...
Aku maybe tak bole lupakan dia sebab aku da kene witch dengan the way when he talk with me kot...
Haha...
But its ok...
Aku rasa mungkin ade jugak sebab len nape aku nampak muka dia dalam mimpi aku...
Maybe he also don’t want me forget bout him even in single minute...
Probaly he doesn’t want me to leave him alone again...
So...
Dia pun berkata...
Janganlah kau tinggalkan daku...




Dunia kita bagai langit dan bumi…
Tau tak kau aku tak boleh hidup satu bumbung???
Kenapa pulak???
Kenapa kau tanya???
Entah la ek....
Tapi aku rasa kau ada jawapanya sebab benda tu selalu sangat berlaku...
Aku da nampak vision ue Yang Aku dengan mamat ue tak akan dapat bersatu...
Yelah bayangkan dia ue da playboy dua tanduk...
Yang aku ne da la perempuan yang tah kudrat tinggal sekerat jup...kot...
Bayangkan biler jumpa dulu cam singa dengan mangsanya...
Asyik di ratah je aku ne...
Hey hidup...hidup...
Andai kata satu hari nanti aku terpaksa juga duduk satu rooftop dengan kau....
Aku janji aku akan buat borderline dalam rumah tu nanti....
Sebab aku sedar aku tak layak untuk diri kau....
Termasuklah keluarga kau jugak...
Jangan salahkan aku dengan apa yang aku buat sebab segalanya berpunca dari kau....
my new friends
He is my new friends…
His kinds like others of my boyfriends…
Well for your information….
He is an open minded person….
Very cool when talk with women….
The way of his character and it affecting on me…
Well as usually he knows how to connect with brand new person in his life…
It very interesting when you know about him…
In my life there is another thing that I know but other person doesn’t…
Well…
Even he is good in our sight…
But when you see his true sight…
We might get shock….
Or heart attack…
Yes…
You see him as a good person and know him as nice guy…
But not me…
My new friends…
He is evil creatures’...

Saturday, June 25, 2011

MY WORLD   BECOME MISERY

When he try seducing me…
I became really awkward when he stare me like want to eat me…
Why he became in that way???
Am I do anything wrong at him???
I don’t think so…
The way he gaze at me it’s really something that I can’t describe in word…
Is there anything that he wants from me???
However, what?
How can I know when he just keep stare on me but not talk to me either…
How you want me understand it???
Using that eye contact like the way you stare toward me??
Guess that the way you want me to understand but it quite innocent
You’re  pop up like a ghost…
You follow me like you are my shadow…
But I never realize that you will always protect me as same as mother who protect their child…
When I come toward you…
You raised straight the hall…
My hearts become ache when you rose away…
What the meaning of that feeling???
Is there anything that still I not realize about this feeling???
Is that the feeling that you want telling me using that eye contact???
How I become so blind about that???
You keep waiting me until I realize by myself the feeling of yours toward me…
The way you smile toward me…
The soft spoken of yours with me…
The way you stare at me…
How you angry with me is different…
Like you never want to be mad with me…
Your attitude is not same as you show to your friend and me …
I like that entire characteristic about you…
Damn…
How I want you very much…
Either I or my heart trembling wanted you more than friends…did
My mind still working hard how to assume you as my dearest…
When you embrace me with that arm of yours…
You make me so comfortable…
You urges me like you will never find me either…
You arouse my interest…
When the heat in our body desire very much…
It makes me hottest…
Like I stand under the sun…
However, neither me nor you…
We still can’t make a part…
We still young person…
We still need our parents to teach us how to become a good human…
We cannot sell our virgin before the time that should will come one day…
As the smart teenage…
You suppose know how to train yourself from become a wild person…
Such as high social…
Clubbing, doing part each other…
So he or she suppose know their gap…
In Islamic we know if we do that thing we will been throw in hell…
So people…
Try to learn how to became a good girl or woman or ladies…
Boy or man or guys out there…
Keep in mind and keep away from Satan whisper…
Don’t you dare listen to all that evil spirit…
Because when you listen and follow what they say…
God will never ever forgiving you until you apologize for what you have don…


Friday, June 24, 2011

TIGA WAJAH

SATU WAJAH...
TERJAWAB SEGALA PERSOALAN SEMALAM
TEGUH MENGHADAPI SEGALA CABARAN
BIARPUN MASIH MENGGUGAT KEWIBAWAAN...


DUA WAJAH...
HARAPAN BERTUKAR KEPADA IMPIAN
PERMINTAAN MASIH BERTERUSAN
NAMUN KUKUH BERSAMA KEKUATAN...


TIGA WAJAH...
KEKABURAN HILANG DIBAWA KENYATAAN
PELUANG DIPERGUNA TANPA KERAGUAN
GEMILANG TIBA TIDAK DILEPASKAN...


NAMUN TIGA WAJAH, KINI MENJADI SATU!!!

SURAT RINDU KEPADA KASIH

KATAKANLAH,
JALAN TERBUKA INI
YANG MENJALAR DARI PUNCAK GUNUNG,
MELINGKAR
LEMBUT PERLAHAN,
BERHENTI SEBENTAR DI TITIAN
DI ARUS SUNGAI TELAH KULEMPARI BATU-BATU
KECIL
DI HUJUNG EMBUN MENITIS SEBUAH RINDU
AKU MENCAIRKAN CINTA


KAU MELIHATKU BEGITULAH SAAT KEINGINAN
DIRI TERBENTUR
HUJUNG TUMITKU YANG PECAH DARI RETAKAN
TERHALUS
MEMBELAH DAN PERIH TIBA-TIBA MENYENTUH
AIR ASIN LAUT-MU
MATA KIAN PEDIH BILA MALAM-MALAM
MENUNGGU


KAU, KEKASIH
AKU MELUTUT DI RAHAMAT-MU
SEBUAH CINTA SEBENARNYA BERADA
DI KEPAK-MU, AKU MENGHULUR TANGAN 
MENAMPUNG TITIS SUCI
DI TABURAN HARUMAN KASIH
AKU TELAH KELU
TUHANKU


BERSAMA-MU
CINTA MENJADI MANIKAM DENGAN SERIBU
WARNA
SEKALIAN PARA KEKASIH MENGHIMPUN
KENANGAN
SEMUA TELAH MENGETEPIKAN JANJI
ATAU AKU YANG DULU SERING MEMBISIK DAN
MERINDUI


KINI
CINTA MENJADI SATTU
AKU TELAH MASUK KE AWAN TERBELAH
KE SEBUAH PINTU RELA
PENENTUAN-MU, YA RABBI.

HOW COULD IT BE?

FIRST TIME WHEN I MEET YOUR EYES...
I CAN READ YOUR PAIN TROUGH YOUR EYES...
IT QUITE DIFFICULT FOR ME TO DESCRIBE HOW PAIN YOU ARE...
BUT...
AS MUCH I CAN SEE IT...
THERE STILL HOPE FOR YOU TO RELEASE THE BURDEN FROM YOUR MIND...


IT MAKE MY HEARTBEAT BECOME FASTER WHEN THE FIRST TIME I BEEN TALKING WITH YOU...
HOW IT BECOMES IN THAT WAY???
I KEEP ASKING MYSELF...
KEEP REPEATING THE QUESTION IN MY MIND...
BEFORE I REALIZE IT...
I'M ASKING MY FRIENDS WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH ME???
I TELL MY FRIENDS HOW MY FEEL TOWARDS HIM...
THEN THEY MADE CONCLUSION THAT I ALREADY FALL IN THE GAZE OF HIS EYES...


WHEN I WALK WITH HIM...
MY HEART POUNDING VERY FAST...
UNTIL MY BREATH IS UNSTABLE AT ALL...
I THINK I WILL COLLAPSE IN THAT TIME TOO...
BECAUSE I ALREADY SHIVERING FROM TOP TO TOE...
IT BECAUSE THE SOFT SPOKEN OF HIM...
MAKE ME LIKE ICE BERG MELTING INTO THE SEA...
HOW COULD IT BE IN THAT WAY???


AM I REALLY FALL IN HOW YOU GAZE AT ME???
THE GAZE THAT FULL WITH PAIN,HEARTLESS,ANGER, AND PASSIONATE...
HOW CAN I BE FALL WITH ALL THAT KIND OF FEELING OF HIM???
IS THERE ANY OF STEREO LOVE THAT YOU MADE TO KEEP ME REMEMBER EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU???
HOW I'M SUPPOSE SEDUCE YOU IF YOU KEEP WATCHING ONLY FROM FAR AWAY??? 
YOU KEEP ME WAITING UNTIL MY HOPE ON YOU BECOME LESS...
GIVE ME YOUR HEART TO MAKE ME TRUST ON YOU AGAIN...
IT UNFORGETTABLE...
EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU...


EVER AFTER

THE EXPLOSION OF MY SOUL
NOW FREED IN TO HIM KEEPING
CARRIED US INTO REALITY
WHERE WE HAD DREAMED WHERE I HAD 
WISHED

TO HOLD HIM CLOSE
TO FLY THROUGH TIME
AS ONE
SKIN SO EASILY TASTED WITH KISSES
FROM LIPS SO EAGERLY AWAITING
MY TOUCH

MY HANDS RAISED WITH FREEDOM
LIFE COURSING THROUGH MY VEINS....
COME WITH ME,MY LOVE
OUR TRAVELS NOW BEGIN
WE FLY INTO THE CLOUDS
NEVER LOOKING BACK
NEVER LOOKING DOWN

FOR TIME HAS HEALED ITS MISTAKE
AND FOLDED ME INTO YOUR EMBRACE
NOW YOUR ARMS
STRONGER THAN BARS OF IRON
WILL HOLD ME CLOSE
KEEP ME NEAR
FOR NOW AND
EVERMORE


Friday, June 3, 2011

SEPASANG MATA ITU

SEPASANG MATA ITU....


Lewat tancapan mata itu
bait-bait sepi tampak dirajut halus
Perit melahar ribuan duka
nan acap menggoyah pekur
Utuh kelu bersayu




Jendela kini menjadi ruang berswarsraya
menengadah jelmaan kirmizi
Mengusut tenang sang biru lazuardi
Gerah menghambar mekar perkasihan
Memercup aura resah
Meruntun nubari




Kejora dibingkis tatapan kelintar
menjelajah bioskop alam semesta
Menggamit ghairah pongah
Menyusun aksara kagum
Akan hamparan luas sayup membumi




Gelisah sang kasih melotot kelu
pertelingkahan berlangsung semu
tikaman lidah menggegar hening
buat ku cuba mencantas sengit sengketa
menangkis balam-balam gundah
menghapus runtunan jiwa




tertuskah kau sang mata?
Mengaungi diriku tuk bermuram durja
Merentet jalur-jalur pembohongan
Merungkai khilaf diri
Inikah kebenaran hakiki
Nan tanjak dijamah?

Thursday, May 5, 2011






Hiroi uchuu no kazu aru hitotsu
Aoi chikyuu no hiroi sekai de
Chiisana koi no omoi wa todoku
Chiisana shima no anata no moto e
Anata to deai toki ha nagareru
Omoi wo kometa tegami mo fueru
Itsushika futari tagai ni hibiku
Toki ni hageshiku toki ni setsunaku
Hibiku ha tooku haruka kanata e
Yasashii uta ha sekai wo kaeru

Hora anata ni totte daiji na hito hodo
Sugu soba ni iru no
Tada anata ni dake todoite hoshii
Hibike koi no uta
Hora hora hora hibike koi no uta
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/m/mongol_800/chiisana_koi_no_uta.html ]
Anata ha kidzuku futari ha aruku
Kurai michi demo hibi terasu tsuki
Nigirishimeta te hanasu koto naku
Omoi ha tsuyoku eien chikau
Eien no hanawa kitto boku ha iu
Omoi kawarazu onaji kotoba wo
Soredemo tarizu namida ni kawari yorokobi ni nari
Kotoba ni dekizu tada dakishimeru tada dakishimeru

Hora anata ni totte daiji na hito hodo
Sugu soba ni iru no
Tada anata ni dake todoite hoshii
Hibike koi no uta
Hora hora hora hibike koi no uta

Yume naraba semenai de yume naraba semenai de
Anata to sugoshita toki eien no hoshi to naru

Hora anata ni totte daiji na hito hodo
Sugu soba ni iru no
Tada anata ni dake todoite hoshii
Hibike koi no uta

Hora anata ni totte daiji na hito hodo
Sugu soba ni iru no
Tada anata ni dake todoite hoshii
Hibike koi no uta
Hora hora hora hibike koi no uta



Small love song (chiisana koi no uta)


One of many in this wide universe
In the great world of this blue earth
This tiny feeling of love will reach
You on the little island
Time have passed since I first met you
The letters with my feelings grow in numbers
Without us realizing, it is already echoing between us
Sometimes intense, sometimes sad
It echoes distantly
This gentle song changes the world


*Look, the person who is important to you
Is right beside you
I just want to reach only you
This echoing love song
Listen, Listen, Listen to this echoing love song


You noticed that even the dark street
We walk on is lit up by the moon every night
Not letting go of the hand I grasped
The feelings are strong, I promise forever
In the depths of forever, I’ll surely say
These same words with my feeling unchanged
But it’s still not enough and turns into tears
It turns into joy, I can’t put into words
Just embracing, just embracing


* Chorus


If it’s a dream, don’t wake up
If it’s a dream, don’t wake up
The time I spent with you
Will turn into everlasting stars

LISTEN TO MY SONG,,,(^ ^)V

kimi no emi de michita EVERYDAY
san nen no tsukihi wa hayasugite
nande mo nee kaiwa to CRAZY FACE
itsumade mo yuugure no eki de
wakare oshi n de ienai jaa ne
futari toki no yurusu made
toshi o kasanete ai o GROWIN' GROWIN'

tsuzuku hazu datta no ni

moshi negai kanau nara mou ichido hana sakasete
ima nara kimi no kanashimi mo kitto uketomerareru kara

kurayami no BLIND DAY & DAY ashimoto sura mienakute
kanashimi to koukai no kusari wa mogaku hodo karamaru dake

kono mama ja itsuka wa SID & NANCY
nukedase nee LOOP like a fuckin' junky
sore demo kono magatta LOVE SONG
kore kara no mirai o takusou

chikara naku tomo
koe karetete mo
todokanaku tomo

kono uta o utau yo

moshi negai kanau nara mou ichido hana sakasete
itsushika kitto kanashimi no hibi no imi mo wakaru kara
hoshi kagayaku sora no shita
tsukiakari ni terasarete
furueta moji de kakitsuketa negai
I wish you will be happy

fukaku mune ni kizami komarete itsumade tatte mo kieru koto nai PAIN
taiyou sura ooikakushite mada yamu koto naku furitsuzukeru RAIN

kumoma kara koboreta hitosuji no hikari o taguri yosete
asu o tsumugu

moshi negai kanau nara mou ichido hana sakasete
ima nara kimi no kanashimi mo kitto uketomerareru kara
hoshi kagayaku sora no shita
mou nidoto karenai hana

sakaseru asu o koko ni chikau kara
I promise I'll make you happy




TRANSLATION

credits:gendou
An "everyday" that has been filled with your smile
3 years just went by too fast with light conversations and crazy faces

Always at the train station during sunset we begrudgingly part, the "goodbye" we can't say

Until time permits, our love was supposed to keep growing, together through the years...

If my wishes would come true, I will make the flowers bloom again
I think I can finally catch, even your sadness

A blind day of darkness, I can't even see my footsteps
The chain of sadness and regret just keeps on entangling to the point I'm struggling

If this continues, we'll be like SID & NANCY
In an inescapable loop like a fuckin' junky
But I think in this twisted LOVE SONG, I'll express what is to come in the future

Even though I am powerless
Even if my voice withers
Even if it will not reach you

I'll continue singing this song

If my wishes would come true, I will make the flowers bloom again
Before we know it, we will find out the meaning of these lonely days

Under the starry sky, where it is lit by the light of the moon
A wish that was shakingly written:
"I wish you will be happy"


A PAIN that was set deep inside my chest that never seems to disappear no matter how long it takes

The RAIN that keeps pouring without stop, even concealing away the sun


From the spaces between the clouds, I haul the ray of light that poured and spin tomorrow


If my wishes will come true
I will make the flowers bloom again
I think I can finally catch, even your sadness
Under the starry sky, a flower that will never again wilt

I will swear our soon to bloom future, right here:
"I promise I'll make you happy"


Saturday, March 26, 2011

KAU dan AKU

kau dan aku,,,


biler di fikirkan balik,,,aku dengan dia,,memang ler rapat,,,tapi kan,,,boleh ker aku dengan dia kekalkan situasi tu??


erm,,,,


we always together if something about prefect pop up...


hahaha,,,


it kind of happy story doesn't it,,,


what you think if u in my place???


you love him,,,


but....


you can't tell at him about your feeling,,,


it little bit sad right???